Something Blue

I've been waiting a long time to write today's post. One of the most wonderful things about getting married is gathering all of the people who have touched two lives together in one room. This last year has been one filled with overwhelming love. We feel so blessed. I am particularly blessed to have many real friendships with sincere and beautiful women. Too many, in fact, to have them all as bridesmaids. Instead, I asked them to be my "something blue." 

Many of these women grew up with me, from little girls giggling at recess to grown women celebrating marriages and births. Some spent late nights rehearsing high school musicals or early mornings warming up for cross country meets. We held each other's hands through school tests and life's tests of traumas or deaths. Others learned with me through college; became women with me in my first real job. All of them have offered willing shoulders and caring hearts. They are the best of people, and I am honored and proud to call them my friends. 

This weekend, you'll notice little pops of blue in all shades among the crowd. A bride's traditional symbol of loyalty, blue is one of those colors that always makes me think of a wedding. Thank you girls, for being true "blue." I love you. 

Something borrowed

My sweet friend Tricia wore these gorgeous pendants on her wedding day, along with a silver heart bracelet she borrowed from me. In a few days, we'll swap places -- she'll support me, and I'll wear her gorgeous earrings with my own gown as my "something borrowed". 

Something old

I always wonder, when I attend weddings, what the bride is carrying with her. Seems that all little girls have heard the saying "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue." They are often sentimental items that remind the bride of her heritage, her loved ones, or her own goals. I'm very proud of the tiny tokens that will be hidden away with me on Saturday.  First, my something old ... 

Since both of my grandmothers have passed away, I've grown pretty attached to Patrick's Granny. I love the connection she and Patrick share. Last winter, we spent a Sunday cleaning out her old farmhouse before she moved. It was an emotional day, but I came away with something I think I will treasure for all my life. The delicate, hand-detailed handkerchief above will be tightly in my grasp as I make my way down the aisle with my dad. (We've discussed here before the fact that I'm a crier!) 

We're getting married!

In 5 days! Yahoo!!!

Happy anniversary!

Tomorrow (April 26) is my mom and dad's 29th wedding anniversary. This year, 7 days from my own wedding, I am thinking of them with more understanding than ever before and with awe for the strong, steadfast commitment they made to each other in their vows. 

The story of a family is made up of love, and time, and memory. Laughter around a dining room table, tears around a gravesite, long drives in a minivan, chores on Saturdays ... For me and my three siblings, at the heart of all of those things are two people who chose to stick it out through hard times. They still steal kisses in the kitchen, they still argue over laundry and dishes, and they are still married. I am so grateful for my parents' anniversary. 

May my life with Patrick mirror yours together. I love you! 

"Things will never quite be the same..."

Union by Robert Fulghum: "You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks - all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will and you will and we will”- those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe”- and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart.

All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “ You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed -- well, I meant it all.” Look at one another and remember this moment in time.

Before this moment you have been many things to one another -- acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this -- is my husband, this -- is my wife."

(Thanks, LER, for this!)

Wedding dreams...

So, apparently now I talk in my sleep? Over the weekend, I was mumbling about wedding stuff and keeping Patrick awake.

And last night I woke myself up laughing! I was dreaming that we were slicing up the cake at the reception, and I was standing over my sister's shoulder watching to make sure she did it right (ack!). I said, "can you make my piece a little bigger?" And she looked at me and huffed and stuck the knife and fork right in the middle of the cake. She said, "How's that?" And we both cracked up laughing. HA! And I was actually giggling.

Which was about the time that Patrick said something like "whyyyy do you talk in your sleep now, be quiet!" or something like that ... for the love!

"It's here, isnt it?"

Real conversation last night after we finished the seating chart for the reception:

"It's really here, isn't it?"
"Yep."
"I mean, after Easter, we have two weekends before the wedding."
"I know." (HUGE smile and hug!)

Yes, it's here! It's here! Three weeks and we'll be headed to the honeymoon. It's finally sinking in, and even though I can't kick the perma-nausea, we both feel happy and excited. This is a good sign, yes? :)

It's been especially wonderful for me to see Patrick getting equally excited about the whole thing. As we mapped out the seating chart last night, he even drew the circles on the poster board for tables and carefully marked entrances and where they led (i.e. " <--- MUZAK, booze; ----> patio, smokers this way) ... It was hilarious!

A crier

This is one of my all time favorite photos from one of my all time favorite weddings. This is Gabie and Dave's wedding, when all in attendance were shocked to see tears streaming down Gabie's face as she walked down the aisle. You see Gabie rarely cries. But there was something about what she saw in Dave's face as she made the walk that forced her emotions to the surface. I was moved. This may be my favorite moment of that day.

We all know that, yes, I am a crier. I cry on pretty much every occasion (joyful, sad, mad, tired). But the reason I posted this image today is that I feel like it explains why we went to the trouble of planning a big wedding instead of jetting off to Honolulu or some other fabulous place to make it official (which has lately seemed like a much easier option!).

You see the way Martha (to my right in the photo above) is watching Gabie and Dave? That is love. That is pure joy and well wishes for them. There are so many people who have helped form us into a couple these seven years, and I wouldn't want to promise my life to Patrick without their eyes watching, without their hearts witnessing what they helped solidify.

So, bring your kleenex people! 25 days!

Wedding Wednesdays

When we got engaged, Patrick and I made a deal that we would only talk about wedding plans and decisions on Wednesdays. Both of us could work on wedding-related stuff during the rest of the week, but we would only harp on it and discuss about it on Wednesdays. This brilliant idea (complements of Shea) worked really well for most of the engagement. It's important to still be in a relationship and still talk about other things and people in your lives, to get out of the shell of the wedding back into reality and work on the house or cook dinner, or just drink wine, watch a movie, and be happy.

So, about a month ago, the whole wedding Wednesday thing was kind of shot out of the water. As you get closer, it's almost unavoidable: "Oh, I checked on the new beer, and they said that was fine." or "Can you call your mom and ask her about so and so's RSVP," etc. So, now we've kind of filled in the negative spaces with wedding banter and declared Wednesdays "No-Wedding Wednesdays." Lordy knows I need them. I think, in many ways, they've been more valuable for us than Wedding Wednesdays were. Point of this post: All wedding all the time makes a cranky couple. It's important to be you, too, not just a bride or a fiance.

30 days!

WOO HOO! :) The true countdown begins.

P.S. If you have questions, don't forget that all of the details and info are on our wedding Web site, www.mywedding.com/futureandersons.

Sweet dreams

Amazing how comforting it is to hear words of solace from friends. I've been having a nervous stomach and even weird dreams about the wedding. A friend just sent a note to remind me of all I have to look forward to beyond the wedding day:

"The relationship you are nurturing is lifelong. This idea comforts me. There will be mistakes made, feelings hurt, egos crushed, dreams modified and expanded, things burnt, lost, sold, or broken, kids screaming, moving and shaking and growing and crying and great feats of strength and accomplishment. And your spouse must be accepting of it all. And if he is willing to join you for the ride, the reward is witnessing the growth and being able to appreciate it. And if he is not, well, you can still call me. You are a strong, wonderous lady. I hope that being married is just a bonus to what is Sarah Preuschl is, not everything, nor definitive. I'm excited to see what you two accomplish as a unit -- what your creativity, brains, devastating good looks, and dreams combined can bring to the world (besides obviously children). I hope that inspires good dreams!"

Wow. What an incredible note of encouragement! So poignant and honest, and such a gift.