So often, instead of being content, I spend lots of time thinking about other people's lives and analyzing my own. Too much. Most of us do.
The most recent Happy Days entry is by Tim Krieder. It's unmarried take on marriage and a reflection on the very human condition of comparing one's self to others -- "the married and the single, the childless and parents, careerists and the stay-at-home." It is particularly poignant, equally hilarious, and scarily true.
Tomorrow's Friday. So here's to a "Happy Day," and here's hoping you find contentment in it.
This Sunday, I woke up with a grumbly tummy and a hungry husband who was convinced that there was simply nothing to eat in our cabinets.
After an argument over the fact that "nothing to eat" is all relative (i.e. "We have plenty of food to make breakfast. Just because we don't have snack-y food doesn't mean we have NOTHING to eat!"), I set out to make waffles. We were short on pancake mix, so I tried to halve the recipe and came out with oily goo. Apparently 1/4 cup of oil is not half of 1/3 cup. I never said I was good at math. We had no milk. No homemade pancakes or waffles. Batter in the trash can.
No milk = no cereal. No bread = no toast. Damn.
So, with the only two eggs we had left, I decided to make a cheese omelet for the very hungry hubby. Um. Have you ever burned eggs? I did. I'll tell you that browned eggs stink. They smell like rotten stink. Omelet in the trash can. Oy vey.
I was distraught, mostly because there was some truth to the statement "we have nothing to eat" and partly because I absolutely destroyed breakfast. I failed at breakfast and felt like a failure of a wife. Hence, the defensive argument we then had about the frequency and cost of grocery shopping in our household. Hence, the inevitable tears and loud sighs that ensued. Hence the making up (well, at least there is an up side).
Here's the truth they might not tell you in marriage counseling: your partner is more than your best friend. If all you want is a best friend, do not say, "I do." A husband isn't the same as a girlfriend or good friend (you need those, too.) You don't get a bracelet or best friend pin for being a good wife. Marriage is not just about romance and fun (but it should try to be!)
Your partner sees the worst, the most vulnerable, the non-public "you." He knows that you burn eggs and ruin pancake batter and squeeze zits and leave shoes askew all over the house. He's the person who knows what your farts smell like, because people fart. You argue tooth-and-nail, you fight and bicker. This is what people who know these things about each other do, for goodness sakes. This is part of the honor of being in it for the long haul.
But even knowing those intimacies, you share deep mutual appreciation. I mean, I appreciate and, well, love the little drool spot on Patrick's pillow when I make the bed. That is HIM. I love this person, not the idea of him or the fairytale of our "perfect" life together.
Hello, people. The truth is that fighting and farting and burnt eggs happen. These things do not make us failures at marriage, because that's what marriage is (better or worse). My husband may be pretty close to a best friend, but he's actually my Ultimate Extreme Friend.
There's another bonus to this truth: botched breakfasts sure make for a good laugh.
The table welcomed guests and the wish station was set up right next to the seating cards. A framed a sign, explaining what do do, said "Welcome! Please share a wish, memory, or bit of wisdom with the bride and groom."A fun jar of colored pencils and pens and hand-cut pieces of chartreuse card stock helped make the task fun for guests of all ages.
This idea certainly isn't something brand new. Couples are making the traditional guest book into all kinds of fancy things: trees with tags hanging from the branches, clotheslines, photo booths, etc. You get the idea. So, this is just one of those many options. And it was fun; I love that we now have these little tokens in an album to remind us of the emotions our guests felt that day (drunk and sober, wink, wink).
Well, here's the "the best thing" about our trip. There we are, flanked by orange metal shelving and home-improvement gear, and our first-dance song comes pumping over the loudspeaker: "You Are the Best Thing" by Ray LaMontagne (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJ3xTjvj9tw).
We stop. We look at each other. We smile, and we kind of transport back to the romantic dance floor of Laurel Hall. Giddy giggles and a kiss. Home Depot dates are awesome!
On weekends, it's fun to day daydream, so I thought I'd share something cool that Style Me Pretty (a popular wedding blog) is doing for brides-to-be. StyleCircle is the blog's social network, and the inspiration board builder is so fun to play with. Using the blog's gallery and my own photos, I can dream up collages like this one, modeled after a black-and-yellow shower I threw a few years ago for a friend. Have fun daydreaming about brunch with girlfriends, mimosas, lollipops, and lemon drops! Happy weekend!
(A-maz-ing photo above, of course, by Shea Halliburton.)
We saved money by decorating these items by hand. The ingredients are simple: a glue gun, foam ball, basket, 2- or 3-inch wide navy silk ribbon, craft moss (in sheets), one package of pearl-stud floral pins and one package floral clips (two-prong pins), and natural-looking silk floral accents. The total cost for all of this was only around $20, which is what the florists quoted me per item had they created them.
I am pretty sure that the small berry twigs really made these two items. They added the sweet, whimsical feel I was seeking. And the wreath and hairpiece my mom made for the girls really tied everything together.
"This one might be my favorite. I love your eyes in this one."
Yes, those are some happy eyes.
P.S. Forgive this Tuesday-morning "Monday Moment." :)